.Editor's Note: The complying with is actually the message of a character coming from Trip 3 Leader Frank L. Culbertson (Leader, USN Resigned), reviewing the celebrations of September 11.September 12, 2001 7:34 p.m.I have not created very much about specifics of the mission in the course of the month I have actually been right here, mostly for two explanations: the initial being actually that there has actually been actually extremely little bit of opportunity to do that kind of writing, and second of all because I am actually not exactly sure how pleasant I am actually discussing thoughts I show friends and family with the rest of the globe.Properly, definitely the world changed today. What I claim or even perform is actually very slight compared to the importance of what happened to our country today when it was actually assaulted through ... by whom? Terrorists is actually all we understand, I suppose. Difficult to know at whom to guide our anger as well as concern ...I had actually only completed an amount of activities today, the most time-consuming being the physical examinations of all team members. In a personal conversation adhering to that, the air travel doctor told me they were actually having a quite bad time on the ground. I had no tip ...He described the scenario to me as best he understood it at ~ 0900 CDT. I was stunned, then horrified. My very first thought and feelings was actually that this wasn't a true talk, that I was still paying attention to among my Tom Clancy tapes. It simply failed to appear achievable on this scale in our nation. I couldn't even visualize the particulars, also just before the information of further devastation started coming in.Vladimir visited fairly swiftly, noticing that something incredibly significant was actually being reviewed. I waved Michael right into the module also. They were actually also blown away and also stunned. After our team signed off, I made an effort to explain to Vladimir and Michael as greatest I could possibly the prospective measurement of this act of horror in downtown New york and also at the Pentagon. They precisely comprehended as well as were very supportive.I eyed the Planet Chart on the pc to find where over the globe our team were actually and also discovered that our team were actually coming southeast out of Canada and would certainly be actually overlooking New England in a couple of mins. I zipped around the terminal up until I located a home window that would give me a scenery of NYC and got hold of the closest video camera. It occurred to be a camera, and also I was appearing south coming from the window of Michael's log cabin.The smoke cigarettes appeared to have a strange bloom to it at the bottom of the column that was streaming south of the area. After reviewing among the newspaper article our experts just acquired, I think our experts were actually checking out NY around the moment of, or even not long after, the crash of the second tower. Just how terrible ...I swept the camera during the East Coast to the south to view if I might view every other smoke around Washington, or anywhere else, however nothing at all showed up.It was actually quite tough to think of job after that, though our team had some to carry out, however on the upcoming track our company traversed the US additional south. All 3 people were working a couple of cameras to attempt to get scenery of New york city or Washington. There was haze over Washington, yet no details resource can be viewed. It all looked astonishing from a couple of hundred miles away. I can not picture the terrible settings on the ground.Other than the emotional effect of our nation being actually dealt with as well as hundreds of our residents and maybe some close friends being actually eliminated, the best mind-boggling emotion being actually where I am is among seclusion.Following day ... I think the exhaustion and also psychological stress acquired the most ideal of me. I couldn't keep awake as well as continue to compose. Today was still tough, yet we started receiving more info, plus we possessed the tribute of talking straight along with the Facility Director, Roy Estess, that ensured our company that the ground crews would remain to operate and also guarantee our protection, and also the risk-free procedure of the Station. Our company additionally heard from our Manager, Mr. Goldin, who incorporated that the companions in the Course are actually all totally committed to carrying on risk-free functions as well as assistance. These were never inquiries for me. I know all these individuals! The ground crews have actually been extremely supportive, really understanding of the influence of the updates, and have actually attempted to become as practical as achievable. They have actually all been actually very professional as well as focused though I can not visualize the interruption of this particular form of updates can be found in and also the notion that federal government structures may be vulnerable. They certainly never bypassed a beat, even when transferring control centers. And a group of elderly personnel and friends provided us a fairly in depth instruction about what was actually understood and what was actually being carried out in the authorities and at NASA on Tuesday mid-day, which was actually really handy and also type of all of them to accomplish in the middle of all the chaos. The Russian TsUP has actually also been supporting as well as beneficial, trying to uplink news articles when our very own resources were actually unusable, and also claiming kind terms ...My crewmates have actually been excellent, too. They understand it's been actually a challenging day for me and also the folks on the ground, as well as they have actually tried to be as also keeled and also useful as possible. Michael even fixed me my favorite Borscht soup for supper. And also they offer me a lot of area to presume when I required it. They are very considerate and also naturally shocked at whoever will perform this.I know numerous people in Washington, many people that journey to DC and NYC, a lot of who are aviators, that I really felt sure I would certainly receive a minimum of a few items of trouble over the upcoming handful of days. I received the 1st one today when I found out that the Leader of the American Airlines jet that attacked the Government was actually Chic Burlingame, a friend of mine. I found Chic during plebe summer season when our team remained in the D&B together, as well as we possessed considerable amounts of courses with each other. I can not picture what he needs to of looked at, and right now I hear that he may possess risen better than our company can easily even consider through perhaps preventing his airplane coming from being actually the one to deal with the White Home. What a horrendous reduction, however I make certain Chic was actually battling bravely throughout. As well as tears don't circulate the very same precede ...It's difficult to define exactly how it really feels to become the only United States completely off the world each time like this. The emotion that I ought to be there with all of you, handling this, helping somehow, is actually frustrating. I recognize that our team perform the threshold (or beyond) of a horrendous switch in the background of the world. Several traits are going to never coincide once again after September 11, 2001. Not just for the 1000s as well as hundreds of people straight had an effect on through these horrendous actions of terrorism, but possibly for everybody. Our company will definitely find ourselves really feeling in a different way about dozens of things, consisting of perhaps room exploration, sadly.It is actually terrible to find smoke pouring from cuts in your personal country coming from such a wonderful viewpoint. The duality of being on a space probe devoted to improving live on the earth and enjoying lifestyle being actually damaged by such unforced, dreadful actions is jolting to the subconscious, no matter who you are. As well as the expertise that every little thing will definitely be different than when our team introduced due to the time we land is a little bit of disconcerting. I have confidence in our nation as well as in our leadership that our company will do every thing feasible to far better protect her and also our family members, and to bring justice for what has been done. I possess confidence that the good folks at NASA will definitely carry out everything important to continue our objective safely and securely and return us safely at the right time. As well as I overlook each one of you quite. I can not exist along with you personally, as well as our company possess a long way to head to accomplish our mission, however be actually specific that my heart is actually along with you, as well as know you remain in my requests.Submissively, Frank.September 14, 2001 10:49 p.m. An improve to the last character ... Fortunately, it is actually been a busy full week up right here. And to prove that, like our nation, our company are actually continuing our designated course along with service as usual (as much as feasible). Tonight the latest add-on to the place, the Russian Docking Area will definitely be launched coming from Baikonur, Kazakhstan. On Saturday evening (US opportunity), it will definitely dock with our team, at a port certainly never used just before on the low point side of the Solution Element. This brand new component is going to provide our team an additional location to dock a Development or even Soyuz as well as will provide a huge airlock with two useable hatches for performing EVA's in Russian Orlan fits, which we will definitely carry out a few of just before our company come home.The problem prior to in dealing with today was inadequate news. The concern now is actually way too much. It arrived at one time when email was repaired, as well as there's inadequate time to read it all! Plus it is actually as well difficult to take care of all of it at once. But I enjoy receiving it, as well as I actually value the excellent letters of help and friendly relationship I am actually getting.We are actually flourishing aboard, obtaining our work performed, and also speaking about things. Final night we had a long dialogue over dinner about the importance of these activities, the feasible activities to adhere to, and what need to be actually done. After supper, Michael resolved informing me that every email he got from good friends in Russia mentioned specifically to tell me just how sorry they were actually that this occurred, stretching their condolences, as well as inquiring just how I was carrying out. Vladimir educated me the Russian word for "condolences" after talking with the previous CDR, Yuri Usachev, on the phone in Superstar Metropolitan area. (Both the Russian and also the English words are actually much extremely long to verbalize effortlessly.) Incredibly types individuals.For the last pair of times, the Russian MCC has been good enough to transfer live broadcasts of broadcast updates regarding the event and also associated tales, to ensure I was effectively notified. Every specialist who has come on free throw line to talk about a technique or even a problem contends some aspect expanded hellos to me with kind terms. Tonight the Russian capcom told our team that as a result of the special day of remembrance in the US, all the time individuals had actually been actually bringing blooms and also edging all the wall surfaces of the United States consular office in Moscow, and also this evening they were igniting candle lights in the road outside the consulate. Just how the planet has actually modified.People anywhere seem to be to acknowledge the senselessness and also terror in this particular strike. And the significant reduction. Moscow has actually taken care of these type of problems in the last couple of years with condo as well as subway battles, so they are as distressed to eliminate this danger as our experts are. Yet all-time low series is that there are actually good folks everywhere who intend to stay in tranquility. I go through that a youngster asked, "The United States is actually so excellent to various other countries, we always assist everybody, just how can they detest us so much?".I hope the instance of participation and also count on that this space capsule and all individuals in the program illustrate daily will one day motivate the remainder of the planet to operate the same way. They must!Sadly, we won't be taking flight over the United States while individuals are actually lighting candles. Don't understand if our team might view that anyhow. Our company performed, having said that, view an extremely unique and also lovely view a few minutes ago: the launch of our Docking Compartment on a Soyuz booster. We were overtaking it and it appeared about 3 mins after its own launch coming from Baikonur as the sunshine struck our station, so it was actually still at night. It seemed like a big comet with a directly, vast rear silhouetted against the dark earth below. Regardless of some negative lighting fixtures for a while as the sunlight struck our window at a reduced position, I dealt with some video recording of it as to begin with our company passed the spacecraft, and afterwards viewed it start to catch up as it gained height and also velocity. I recorded until primary motor cutoff as well as booster separation took place just like we came close to dawn on the Mountain ranges. An extraordinary attraction in a remarkable week ...Life goes on, also precede. Our experts're here to remain ... Frank.